My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
