And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
