So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
