Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
