Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
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