YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize