I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
i black out too much to be "responsible"
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
