Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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