god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
