Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
