I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
