Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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