You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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