Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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