Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
