My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Randomize
