It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
