It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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