I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Randomize
