What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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