What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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