If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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