I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
