I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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