OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
