i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
