OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
