I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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