Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
