You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize