seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
