In America we eat man semen.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
