omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My vagina is very pro this idea
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
