Sponge bath it is.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
