what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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