Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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