who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
You can't special order awesome
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
