Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
