There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
