Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
