i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
