She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
