I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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