Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
drinking out of a sandbucket again
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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