new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
