One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Sorry my hands just texted you
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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