So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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