i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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