I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
