i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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